Ron Stoppable Vs The World
by Ninja Master
Summary: Ron is dating a high schooler.  He meets the girl of his dreams.  To date her.  He must defeat her seven evil exs to date her.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Snowy suburbs of Toronto. "Ron Stoppable is dating a high schooler?" Four twenty-somethings lounge around a small kitchen table. Felix Renton, 25, shaggy hair, Canadian cowboy chic. "Really? Is she hot?" Kim Possible, 22, cute, bitter, sweatshirt with a zipper. "How old are you now, Ron? Like twenty-eight?" "I'm not playing your little games." "So you've been out of high school for like, 13 years and – "I'm twenty-two. Twenty –two!" "And you're dating a high school girl? Not bad, not bad." Young Will, 20, simple mind, layered T-Shirts. "Like, did you guys 'do it" yet?" Ron Stoppable, 22, fresh faced and charmingly cocky with an unruly adorable mop of hair. "We have

done many things. We ride the bus. We have meaningful conversions about how yearbook club went and about her friends and, um… you know… drama." "Yeah, okay, have you even kissed her?" "We almost held hands once, but then she got embarrassed." "Well. Aren't you pleased as punch?" "So, what's her name?" Pleased as punch. "Yori Chau. She's Chinese." Under his breath. "Chinese…" Young Will pauses his Nintendo DS. "Wicked! How'd you meet her?" "I believe I mentioned the bus?" Ron Stoppable prepare to tell an amazing story: Yori, 17, cute and innocent with clothes to match, sits next to her mother. Mother Chau, 45, demanding. "You are seventeen year old! Time to get interested in boy!" "Mom!" Yori drops her bag, books scatter everywhere. "You drop book." Yori crouches down to pick up her books, grumbling. "Hey…" Yori looks up to see the cute and gallant Ron Stoppable holding her books. RON STOPPABLE, 22 YEARS OLD, RATING: AWESOME. Stars appears in Yoir's eyes. Ron grins heroically. Ron winks at Yori. Back in the kitchen, everyone looks at Ron… "That seriously the end of the story?" "Yes. It is." Young Will un pauses his Nintendo DS.

"So when do we get to meet her" "Oh please. Let it be soon." DINGY DONGI! "That's for me." An eager Yori stands outside. Ron smiles broadly. "You promise to be good?" "Of course I'll be good!" "No, really. Please be good." "Am I normally not?" Felix Renton comes to the door and peers through. "Oh, hey Yori, this is Felix Renton. He's the talent." "Hey." Renton shouts the door on a confused Yori. "Is she gonna geek out on us?" "She'll just sit in the corner, man." "I mean, I want her to geek out on us." "She'll geek. She geeks. She has the capacity to geek." Felix Renton quickly opens the door and waves Yori in. "You're good." Yori enters, looking around the rehearsal pad with awe: Bare bulb, ratty rug, drums, guitar, bass, LAME BRAND amps. "Wow." "Yori, that's Kim. Lemmme get your coat." Ron throws Yori's coat on the floor. Yori

waves. Hi, sorry what was your name?" "Kim." "You play the drums?" Kim sitting behind the drum set, sticks in her hands. "…yes." "That is so awesome." "Yori that's Young Will." "Hi. What do you play?" "Uh, wow…Zelda…Tetris…that's kind of a big question." Yori stares blankly at Young Will, who finally gets it. "Oh. I'm not in the band. I just live here." Sex Bob-Omb has geared up. Amps hum to life. "Let's start with Launch Pad Mcquack." "That's not the actual title of the- "WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB! 1-2-3-4!" Kim bashes the kit and Sex Bob-Omb explode into rock!

RON STOPPABLE VS THE WORLD

The small rehearsal space seems to grow with the music. Felix Renton barks unintelligible lyrics. Yori watches jaw a jar. The song ends. "You guys…are so…amazing.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Ron bids adieu to a stunned Yori as she gets on a bus. "I can't even…Sex Bob-Omb. Amazing." The band and young Will lounge around in Felix Renton's bedroom. "She seems nice. "Yeaaah." "Ron, if your life had a face I would punch it." "Yeaaah…wait, what?" "I mean, are you really happy or are you really evil?" "Like, do I have ulterior motives or something?" "I'm offended, Kim." "Wounded even?" "Hurt Kim." "You? Hurt?" Ron takes a breath, turns to Young Will. "Will, you were saying she seems awesome." "Yeah, she

seems awesome." "Yeaaaaah…" Ron hangs his coat up in a fringy, one room apartment. He turns to Josh Mankey, dark hair, arched eye brow, disloyal. JOSH MANKEY, ROOMATE, 24 YEARS OLD, FAN FACT: HE IS GAY! "Before you hear some dirty lies from someone else, yes, I'm dating a 17 year old." Josh looks up from the NOW magazine he's reading. "Is he cute?" "Ha, ha, ha, ha." "Dose that mean we have to stop sleeping together?" "Do you see another bed in here?" Tiny boxes of text. Indicate the ownership

of the items in the one room flat: 95% belongs to Josh, futon included. "Yeah. You're totally my bitch forever." "So. The whole seventeen year old thing. Don't tell too many people." "Hey, you know me." "I mean. Don't tell my sister." "You know me." Josh tosses the NOW Magazine aside, starts texting. "Who are you texting?" RINGY RING. The phone goes. Ron picks up. "Seventeen years old? Scandal!" Tara Stoppable, cute, peppy, barista, gabbing on her cell phone in the Second Cup. A sign behind her reads "If you are using your cell phone you will not be served". TARA STOPPABLE, YOUNGER SISTER, 19, RATING: 'T' FOR TEEN. "That's not true. Who told you?" "Josh.

Duh." "That gossipy bitch." "You know me." Ron turns to see Josh on a second cordless. "Josh!" Josh clicks off. Ron sinks into an armchair. "Who is this mysterious child you date?" "Her name is Yori. Yori Chau." "A seventeen year old Chinese schoolgirl? You're ridiculous." "It's a Catholic school too." "With the uniform and everything?" "Yeah, the whole deal." "Oh my God, you haven't - "No no no. We haven't even held hands. I think she hugged me once." "Um, Ron. Why are you doing this?" "I don't

know…it's just nice, you know? It's just…simple." "It's been over a year since you got dumped by she-who-will-not-be-named." Ron glances down at the partially obscured NOW Magazine, looking into the hot girl's eyes on the back cover album ad. "So, are you, legitimately moving on, or is this you being insane?" Ron looks at strip of photo booth pictures: he smiles next to a hot redhead in happier times. "Can I get back to you on that?" A school bell clangs loudly… Josh and Ron stand outside a Catholic high

school. Uniformed boys and girls pour out. "I do not want to be here. At all." "This school has boys too." I hate you. Even I would think twice about dating a seventeen year old." "Well, she's only allowed out when the sun is up, so I wouldn't call it dating, more like…" "Playtime?" That doesn't sound so good either."


End file.
